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I’ve been a baseball mom for a long time. From T-ball to College I’ve watched my son hit that ball with the sharp crack of the bat. Some hits were better than others but Ben played very well. So well that he got on a minor league team for just a few days, before a bigger, more experienced guy took his spot. It’s the way of life in baseball. It is a business after all.

Now I watch his son, Luke play ball. He’s taller than his Dad was at this age. What’s amazing is how much he moves just like his Dad did! Talk about Déjà vu!  Luke also plays very well, and it’s a joy to watch him run the bases in his father’s footsteps.

With all of these ballgames that I’ve watched, however, today was a first. When Luke successfully stole a base for his team, the ump declared it resulted from “Defensive Indifference.” I was astonished. Never, in all of my baseball years, had I heard that phrase before!

Of course, being the Word Nerd that I am, I had to look it up. My sources stated that “Defensive Indifference is when one team steals a base without the other team attempting to throw them out on the base paths. It usually happens when the defense is winning by at least two runs and does not care about the runner’s advance.”

In other words, the offense just gave up.

Wow. They gave up. And yet, I understand all too well how discouraging things can be in life. My grandson’s team was ahead by several runs at that point. I think I’d be a bit discouraged and tempted to give up at that point as well. It has been a long baseball season, the weather is hot and humid and their opponent (my grandson’s team) has been doing extremely well.

I’ve been attending GriefShare at a local church and we each share our layers of grief that elicit tears from everyone in the group. Sometimes our hurts and concerns become overwhelming to us, as the bills build up, family members are hurtful, and (oh yes) we are still grieving our loved ones who have gone on to eternity before us. It can prompt us to yell “uncle” and let our defenses down. We’re not going to win, we reason, so we give up. Defensive Indifference.

But isn’t that what the evil one wants us to do? If he can convince us we don’t have a chance at overcoming life’s painful challenges, he’s won battle number one: He’s distorted the promises of a faithful and loving God. At these times, we can cling to God’s Word as a drowning man clings to a life saver thrown his way:

“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:22-23 ESV

“The Lord is faithful. He will establish you and guard you against the evil one.” 2 Thessalonians 3:3 ESV

“Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful.” Hebrews 10:23 ESV

I believe there is a reason that the Armor of God (Ephesians 6 10-18) gives us specific ways to battle against the evil one. It describes each piece of armor that a warrior needs to defend him or herself from the enemy’s arrows. And in all of my years on earth since I’ve been a born-again Christian, the arrows have never ceased.

Might I suggest a strategy? Instead of “Defensive Indifference,” glean help from God’s Word. I’ll call it, “Offensive Concern.”

Memorize the Armor of God. And when you feel like throwing in the towel, say it silently or out loud if you want. The evil one hates it. Just like he hates you and wants the worst for you.

Contrast that to our loving Savior who only wants the best for you.

Ephesians 6:10-18 NIV

The Armor of God

¹⁰ Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. ¹¹ Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. ¹² For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. ¹³ Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. ¹⁴ Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, ¹⁵ and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. ¹⁶ In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. ¹⁷ Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

¹⁸ And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.

Have you ever heard the saying, “What doesn’t kill us, makes us stronger?” I suppose some might say, “What doesn’t kill us makes us weaker,” or “Angrier,” or “Weakens our faith.” I suppose, on any given day, I might have chosen one of these options because the last five years have taxed every part of my faith, my patience, and my strength, both spiritual and physical.

On December 18, 2018, my husband Steve had a stroke. It was not a smooth transition to rehab (but that’s another whole blog post!). It was, however, the beginning of a nightmare that grew increasingly difficult over the next five years.

To summarize several key areas, his stroke impacted my writing, my happiness, my friendships, and my family relationships. Sadly, the vascular dementia from the stroke, progressed to Alzheimers and Steve passed away on September 2, 2023. I’ll never forget the phone call in the middle of the night saying he was unresponsive. To say I was shocked was an understatement.

I could not get ahold of ANYONE (phones are usually turned off at night). I packed up Mocha, my dog and started the worst journey of my life to the Memory Care Center, an hour and a half away. I did not make it in time. Midway on my drive, the nurse called to say he had died. I pulled over and wept.

I was in NE at the time to be closer to my son who was stationed at Offut AFB. I knew I needed to return to Iowa where our home had been for 30 years. The move was yet another nightmare, for reasons I will not go into.

I returned to Hobby Lobby in Des Moines and got a part time seasonal job. I’d worked there when I was in CA and enjoyed it. I am still working there part time and still enjoy it. It is an added financial help, along with my survivor benefits from Steve.

I found a nice apartment in Johnston and returned to my former church. I’ve joined a small Bible study group and started a Moms of Military Group, to offer prayer support for those whose sons and daughters are being deployed. Along with the spring weather, I’ve experienced some rebirth in joy. I just started GriefShare and hope it offers an outlet for the massive grief I feel, not just from being a widow, but from the resurgence of grief after losing my daughter, Bethany, in 2003.

For the first time in 5 years, I’ll be attending a Writer’s Conference this June.

And for the first time ever, I’ve re-released one of my novels through Cooper’s Quill Publishing: “Fields of the Fatherless.”

If you’d like to buy a paperback copy, it’s just $9.99 at Amazon.

Click view on Amazon.

I’d appreciate your prayers for so many reasons. ((HUGS))

Elaine